Relationship Psychology and Patterns

This article is part of the Relationship Psychology and Patterns series. When people describe their sexless marriage to someone else — a therapist, a close friend, occasionally an internet stranger at two in the morning — they almost always frame it as a mystery. Something happened. Something changed. We used to be fine and then we weren’t, … Read more

This article is part of the Relationship Psychology and Patterns series. Ask most couples in a disconnected marriage whether they communicate, and the answer is almost always yes. Of course they talk. They talk constantly — about the kids, the calendar, what needs doing at the weekend, whether someone remembered to call the plumber. There’s no shortage … Read more

This article is part of the Relationship Psychology and Patterns series. There’s a particular argument that plays out in disconnected marriages so reliably you could almost set it to a script. One person is trying to talk — about the distance, about the lack of closeness, about the fact that things don’t feel right anymore. The other … Read more

This article is part of the Relationship Psychology and Patterns series. Most couples who end up in a deeply disconnected place — emotionally distant, physically cold, going through the motions of a shared life without much actual contact — didn’t decide to get there. They didn’t choose distance. What they did, usually without realising it, was respond. … Read more

This article is part of the Relationship Psychology and Patterns series. One of the most common things people say when they’re trying to make sense of a sexless or disconnected marriage is some version of: we used to be so close. We used to want each other. Something happened, and I don’t know what. And the confusion … Read more